Daydreaming About My Future BFF Mindy Kaling
Dear Mindy Kaling,
The sound of myself reciting “Dear Mindy Kaling” in my head
provides me with a sort of anxiety that I hadn’t anticipated prior to sitting
down to write this. While I didn’t think I would ever be typing that phrase,
it’s really that I know that what I’m about to write you is actually about as
ridiculous as it sounds.
I want to work for you. Or ideally, with you. I know that the humans of this earth probably solicit
themselves to you all the time. They want to be your assistant, they want write
for The Mindy Project, they want to
be included in one of the chapters of your book, or they just want to bring you
your coffee. I’ve always thought of these things, of course. But here I am, one
of those people pining for your attention. It’s not because I know you’re
famous. You’re an amazingly talented writer who has crafted this fabulous
career based on who you are. Your work accurately presents what you’re about
and how you want your audiences to perceive you. My admiration for you is so
strong that I would not settle learning from anyone less.
Yes, I am your biggest fan. Watching your television show is
my Fall favorite ritual, my friends and I tag each other on your Instagram
posts that chronicle your incredibly stylish outfits, and I mention you in
every conversation I have with anybody who asks me about what I want to be when
I grow up. Those conversations usually involve me saying, “I want to have my
own show like Mindy Kaling” and then we talk about how funny you are (good news
on that front, I am alike in that I think I’m hilarious. Only my twin sister is
the only person that would probably agree).
My dream-life would consist of me conceptualizing and
writing my own show on primetime television. I’ve spent so many years of my
life on things that I thought were important at the time. Starting at 16, I
worked my way up to a general manager in a small smoothie place in my town. For
six years, I worked full-time while attending school and realized that I needed
to start doing things for myself. Why was I wasting my time with things that
wouldn’t matter to me in five years? It just wasn’t a part of the world I saw
myself in.
I wanted to be a writer. And though I’m on my way to finishing
school, I’ve also realized after I’m finally done, then what? I’ve had multiple
serving and retail jobs, but when I’ve finished my undergraduate degree, what
have I done to reach my goal of episodic storytelling? So I’ve come to you, a
person who is a part of my ultimate dream. I know you don’t know me and I only
have a shallow media-based understanding of you. But I appreciate who you are
as a person and I want to learn from you and only you.
If somehow you actually end up reading this and even then
don’t end up glazing over the words, like a marriage vow, I want you to know
what you would get out of this. I will always put the punctuation inside the quote when writing. I will
make sure you know how on-point your outfit is and maybe we could even trade
fashion ideas (I have a budding fashion blog). I will take a lot of notes and ask a lot of
questions. I will do any errands you want me to if I could be on set. I will
politely listen during table-reads and in the writer’s room (which seems to be
more like your apartment). I will ask you a
lot of advice. And I will never stop learning to become better.
So maybe you’re not getting as much out of this as I would
be, but you would be giving someone a chance that they wouldn’t ordinarily get.
I’m just a young girl from Colorado who feeds into her own daydreams. But you
would be helping someone engage in the same dream you once had. And I promise I
won’t let you down. This is something I’ve wanted for so long, something I’m
extremely ready and prepared to do. Why not me?
Your beyond hopeful stalker fan,
Ariel Sullivan
P.S. I can send you sample scripts, my resume, and cookies to sweeten the deal. The cookies aren’t laced with anything and those can be sent by mail.
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