Daydreaming About My Future BFF Mindy Kaling

Tuesday, August 11, 2015

August 11, 2015

Dear Mindy Kaling,

The sound of myself reciting “Dear Mindy Kaling” in my head provides me with a sort of anxiety that I hadn’t anticipated prior to sitting down to write this. While I didn’t think I would ever be typing that phrase, it’s really that I know that what I’m about to write you is actually about as ridiculous as it sounds.

I want to work for you. Or ideally, with you. I know that the humans of this earth probably solicit themselves to you all the time. They want to be your assistant, they want write for The Mindy Project, they want to be included in one of the chapters of your book, or they just want to bring you your coffee. I’ve always thought of these things, of course. But here I am, one of those people pining for your attention. It’s not because I know you’re famous. You’re an amazingly talented writer who has crafted this fabulous career based on who you are. Your work accurately presents what you’re about and how you want your audiences to perceive you. My admiration for you is so strong that I would not settle learning from anyone less.

Yes, I am your biggest fan. Watching your television show is my Fall favorite ritual, my friends and I tag each other on your Instagram posts that chronicle your incredibly stylish outfits, and I mention you in every conversation I have with anybody who asks me about what I want to be when I grow up. Those conversations usually involve me saying, “I want to have my own show like Mindy Kaling” and then we talk about how funny you are (good news on that front, I am alike in that I think I’m hilarious. Only my twin sister is the only person that would probably agree).

My dream-life would consist of me conceptualizing and writing my own show on primetime television. I’ve spent so many years of my life on things that I thought were important at the time. Starting at 16, I worked my way up to a general manager in a small smoothie place in my town. For six years, I worked full-time while attending school and realized that I needed to start doing things for myself. Why was I wasting my time with things that wouldn’t matter to me in five years? It just wasn’t a part of the world I saw myself in.

I wanted to be a writer. And though I’m on my way to finishing school, I’ve also realized after I’m finally done, then what? I’ve had multiple serving and retail jobs, but when I’ve finished my undergraduate degree, what have I done to reach my goal of episodic storytelling? So I’ve come to you, a person who is a part of my ultimate dream. I know you don’t know me and I only have a shallow media-based understanding of you. But I appreciate who you are as a person and I want to learn from you and only you.

If somehow you actually end up reading this and even then don’t end up glazing over the words, like a marriage vow, I want you to know what you would get out of this. I will always put the punctuation inside the quote when writing. I will make sure you know how on-point your outfit is and maybe we could even trade fashion ideas (I have a budding fashion blog). I will take a lot of notes and ask a lot of questions. I will do any errands you want me to if I could be on set. I will politely listen during table-reads and in the writer’s room (which seems to be more like your apartment). I will ask you a lot of advice. And I will never stop learning to become better.

So maybe you’re not getting as much out of this as I would be, but you would be giving someone a chance that they wouldn’t ordinarily get. I’m just a young girl from Colorado who feeds into her own daydreams. But you would be helping someone engage in the same dream you once had. And I promise I won’t let you down. This is something I’ve wanted for so long, something I’m extremely ready and prepared to do. Why not me?

Your beyond hopeful stalker fan,
Ariel Sullivan

P.S. I can send you sample scripts, my resume, and cookies to sweeten the deal. The cookies aren’t laced with anything and those can be sent by mail.

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